Hollywood Running Out Of Pixie Dust

Once we run out of #fairytales, let's make a #liveaction version of every animated feature we've ever done. http://t.co/Z7oSfbzJgD via @thr
— Kendra Liedle (@Cococaffeine) March 30, 2015

The Hills Are Alive With Boysenberries?

I've seen (and heard) some ridiculous advertising concepts in my day, and I especially enjoy seeing international commercials featuring well-known people, a la Bill Murray in Lost In Translation.

I studied advertising in college, even have a degree in it, but decided I didn't want to be the copywriter hawking Junior Mint concepts to un-creative clients, like Augusten Burroughs (as he wrote about in his book, Possible Side Effects) or become blinded by hours of doing layouts via Photoshop. I also thought advertising would be too cutthroat...so instead I decided to go "swimming With sharks" in Hollywood... Doesn't make much sense, I know, but that's for another story.

As much as the Hayley Westenra commercial I posted today makes me, uh, chuckle, I also know exactly what they're selling, the qualities they want to highlight in those little boysenberry pockets of goodness, and it's of course, memorable and just under 30 seconds. All of which make my advertising studies deem it a successful commercial. I don't know though, you be the judge.

*Photo credit: Bostonthiparty/flickr

Historically Hollywood

Before I ever settled in Los Angeles, I studied the history of Hollywood quite a bit. I found it fascinating and I always secretly wished that I could have been around for Hollywood's "Golden Age." In college, I even wrote a thesis on it-- mostly because it gave me a great excuse to read the mega-stack of old Hollywood books I'd been reading anyway. My grandmother, a lifelong "fan" of all things Hollywood, also had a tremendous collection of Hollywood era books I'd been reading since I was a kid. Through my talks with her, I was able to vicariously live my own "Golden Age" existence ~ which was all the spark I needed to catch the entertainment bug myself.

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With the explosion of the internet and my increased online publishing, I find myself again writing about Hollywood. Please check out some of my "Historically Hollywood" articles at the links below:

Evolution Of The Movie Star: How Stars Came To Be

Evolution Of The Movie Star: The Studio System

The Hollywood Studio System: The End Of An Era

*Photo credit: Secretspecialbeach/flickr

Are We Doomed To Repeat Ourselves?

People may not seem to remember, but before there was Hilary, there was Elizabeth Dole. During the early bit of the 2000 U.S. Presidential Race, I was working at a country club--one of several that I would work at in the coming years. That particular day, I ended up being the server for one of Elizabeth's breakfast campaign fundraisers. As she was in Florida campaigning, guests had to make do with her husband, Bob Dole.

My sole job was to make sure there was enough coffee, cream, rolls, and fruit juice available to make people feel well-fed and happy enough to part with a good chunk of change. Dutifully, I hovered by the breakfast table as Bob Dole gave his fundraising speech. That was back in the day when he was doing those erectile dysfunction commercials for Viagra.

"Some of these guys on CNN, they even frighten me," I remember him saying as I checked the supply of decaffeinated coffee.

Afterward, I briefly met him...he introduced himself and shortly after he shook my hand, a secret-service agent swooped down, out-of-nowhere, and flew to the other end of the room in high-speed Batman motion. I was terrified, but when I looked up at Mr. Doles' face, he was still chattering away, as if nothing had happened.

Here was a guy who, faced with the possibility of being first gentleman, said "all I ask is that I have a car to toodle around in and a beeper so I don't get left behind anywhere." He was someone who could have been president if he'd displayed his humorous side early on instead of being so serious all the time.

Elizabeth Dole eventually dropped out of the presidential race. Seven years later, we still have not seen our first female president. And now we face the possibility of Hilary and Bill gracing the White House with their presence {again} in a similar role reversal. Is now the time? Hopefully the American public doesn't support Hilary solely on her gender. I hope we're smarter than that.

But after years and years of Bushes, even the Clintons are looking better all the time. Lately, even our movie choices have been better than our political candidates. Now it's looking like both politics and Hollywood are riddled with sequels.

What if 2012 saw Chelsea Clinton running against the Bush twins? That would be worse than another Rambo ( yet oddly more entertaining...) Even Bill Clinton seems funnier these days... at least funnier than I remember. All I know, from experience, is that no matter who's running, one should always be on the lookout for those shifty-eyed Secret Service agents.

Secret Spy Stash

You think you’re anonymous there sitting on the bus. You briefly glance up from your Margot Kidder paperback and see me benignly working on a word search. I look focused on finding all the Greek mythology figures that begin with the letter “H.”

Ah, but you’re missing out. I’m a writer and this is my ruse. I’m watching you with your reading glasses, your brown trousers, and those dress socks you've folded neatly to accentuate your boring, brown loafers. I imagine you're a librarian with all the free paperbacks you could ever wish for. I nickname you "Marian The Librarian" in my head and wonder silently why (with all those free books) you look so irritable and unhappy. You see, it's not just today. I see you often on the bus, and you always have the same unfriendly demeanor.

And this, is precisely why I take the bus…in L.A. even though I have a car and ( at least for now, I have money for gas.)

Writers are sly. We eavesdrop, we stare, and we viciously write down details about you and the little conversation you’re having on your cell phone. We take note of what you’re reading, what you’re wearing, and your most interestingly charactery mannerisms.

You think that you’ll never be famous, but we write about you -- well, parts of you, merged along with swirls of color from other people we’ve met along the way… names changed, of course. We fill notebooks with character information and observations-- our secret spy stash for later.

Taking the bus is more than just an eco-friendly journey toward my day job – it’s an encapsulated experience to observe people I’d otherwise never come in contact with --if I limited myself only to the Californian ‘car culture commute.’ ( And yes, I also take the subway)

Writers must go out of their way to experience more than just the celebrity smut-ness and reality-obsessed television and fantasy-land of L.A. All that Hollywoodland sugar takes us further and further away from the plights of ordinary people. And believe it or not, those we deem as “ordinary” actually have the most interesting stories--which is why I pay attention to you, sitting on the bus by yourself…

Someday you might actually smile.