The business side of it is exhausting. It feels like a time suck. It always feels like I'm not getting anywhere. I have decent phone etiquette. I remember names. I keep good records. I even have good handwriting. Apart from all of that, I'm a solid writer--if that counts for anything.
Sometimes I ask myself: "Why am I no further then where I started?" There are times I grumble and bellyache and I wonder if all of this was one big colossal mistake.
I've traveled further than I think I have. And I'm getting closer to my destination than I've ever been, I should enjoy the journey, even though there's no estimated time of arrival.
That said, sometimes I do feel like quitting. Sometimes I feel like the gatekeepers are against me. Sometimes I want to flounce onto my bed and cry or scream or punch a pillow or do all three things at once. When I'm angry, I'll write... anything, everything. I throw rocks at my characters-- the way it should be. I take walks. I consider all my options and then I eat too much chocolate or too much ice cream. Sometimes both. Most importantly, I cling to my sanity and hold onto my soul.
And my faith: There's no shame in quitting or finding an alternate route. There are pathways that have yet to be discovered and maybe, just maybe, they lead to your destination. I tell myself that anyway.
To my fellow writers, always remember: There are people out there whose sole job is to say, "NO." Always. Saying "NO" protects them from colossal mistakes. Saying "NO" means they might actually get to leave the office on-time.
A YES means someone has to do something. And no one really wants to do anything. Especially in Hollywood.
Including me... so I'll end here and leave you with this:
Better Off Dead: Or Why Quitting the Movie Industry Was My Path to Salvation
Apparel And Gifts For Angry Writers
©2012 by KLiedle